@Tommytoughstuff
aka Rickyroughguy
ID:450010057
calendar_today29-12-2011 19:23:07
27,4K Tweets
23,4K Followers
393 Following
7 years ago
*watching James Blunt mouth 'not you' to me after singing You're Beautiful in concert*
4 months ago
ME: (throwing my car keys to the valet) Run me over real quick, chief.
9 years ago
[Hostage situation]Um I don't want to be 'that hostage', but I just want to let you know I have a gluten allergy.
The first person to see a sunset was probably like well this ain't good.
Got at least three bed wetters here
If you popped a balloon within 40ft of this group at least two of them would start crying
5 months ago
[having dinner with my magician friend]*waiter drops off the check**a puff of smoke from across the table*ME: Real nice dude.
“Let me get this straight, you got your asses kicked by four fully mature mutant ninja turtles?”“No, sir, it’s actually worse than that.”
1 decade ago
welcome to map clubthe first rule of map clwhats that?no sorry this is not fight clubok see you are hereyou actually want to be over h
GRIZZLY DETECTIVE: Son, I’ve seen things that would haunt your dreams.TRUE CRIME PODCASTER: Speaking of dreams, let’s hear from our sponsor Casper Mattress!
Math problem. I have three apples and am traveling towards you at 17mph. It's not really a problem, more of a warning. Apple time, bitches.
HANG GLIDER COP: I see a crime happening directly below me[glides on]Not much I can do
5 years ago
ME: I wish I had a TV camera I can look at in opportune momentsGENIE: um okME: I wish everyone was gullibleGENIE: DoneME: And I wish for updogGENIE: What's updog?ME: *looks at camera*
me, to shovel salesman: [at a shovel store] how’s this do with like dirt & stuff?shovel salesman: i’m not gonna bullshit you it’s pretty good
6 months ago
I sat on the toilet for too long now I’m a darn Halloween Spirit store!
6 years ago
*falls down several flights of stairs, breaking multiple bones*ME: *into headset mic* I'm in
3 years ago
Lol I JUST figured out why shaggy and scooby are so hungry all the time! It is because they are growing boys
Quit making videos about how the inside of our bodies work, it’s gross.
[inventing the hot air balloon] I don't give a fuck where I go